I Put the Pen Down… and Why I’m Picking It Back Up

I didn’t stop writing because I ran out of things to say. I stopped because life got loud.

Somewhere between being a working mom, carrying a high-expectation job, trying to be present at home, show up in my marriage, love kids who didn’t come from my body but live in my heart, and keep my faith intact… I put the pen down.

Not intentionally.

Not dramatically.

It just slowly slipped from my hands.

I told myself I was “too busy.” That I’d come back when things felt calmer. When I had more room on my plate. When I could say it perfectly.

But here’s the truth: life doesn’t get quieter.

And waiting for perfect steals the power from obedience.

There have been nights I’ve gone to bed exhausted. Not just physically, but emotionally. Carrying the weight of expectations from work, from others, and honestly, from myself. I’m a giver by nature, and when you give from a place that’s running on empty, resentment can quietly creep in. I’ve felt it. I’ve wrestled with it. And I’ve asked God to soften my heart more times than I can count.

Writing has always been the place where I lay it all down. Where I’m honest about the messy parts. The parts that don’t fit into a caption or a Sunday smile. And lately, I’ve felt a nudge I can’t ignore anymore.

Pick the pen back up.

Not because I have it all figured out. Not because I suddenly have extra time. But because there’s freedom in laying it all out.

If you’re a working parent who feels stretched thin… If you’re carrying the invisible weight of responsibility… If you’re loving a family that didn’t come together easily… If you’ve put parts of yourself on the back burner for everyone else…

You’re not alone.

I’m writing again because I need the reminder just as much as anyone else, that God meets us in the overwhelm. That our stories don’t have to be polished to be purposeful. And that sometimes, the bravest thing we can do is show up honestly.

So here I am.

Messy. Faith-filled. Tired. Hopeful.

Pen in hand again.


Discover more from BeyondBonusMom.blog

Subscribe to get the latest posts sent to your email.

2 responses to “I Put the Pen Down… and Why I’m Picking It Back Up”

  1. Always good to show up…and that’s expressing self in the most authentic manner, I opine… 😀

    Like

  2. love the sentence “our stories don’t have to be polished to be purposeful” 💕

    Like

Leave a comment

About Me

I’m Mariah, the creator and author behind this blog. I’m a proud bonus mom to four amazing kids—a 16-year-old daughter, a 14-year-old son, a 10-year-old son, and an 8-year-old daughter—and my husband and I have a 3-year-old daughter together. Navigating life in a beautifully blended family, I’ve experienced the challenges, joys, and unique dynamics that come with being a bonus mom.